Being on a cruise should be one of the most exciting and happiest experiences you have but it appears for some unfortunate folk, things can terribly wrong. I’ve compiled a list of my top ten cruise crimes. The aim of this post is not to put you off cruising, despite these stories I’m going to share with you, they are thankfully few and far between. My advice is, as long as you don’t commit any of these crimes you and your fellow passengers should have a fabulous time on board your cruise.
1. Drink too much
Enjoying a cocktail is part of my holiday but some passengers can take it to the extreme. A fellow cruise passenger once told me that they saw someone vomit in a Jacuzzi due to over indulgence. Trust me, no one will think your cool after they clear the lido deck for ‘essential cleaning and maintenance’.
2. Use the elevator as a toilet
Yes, apparently this has actually happened! More disturbingly it wasn’t a Number One. This brings a whole new meaning to the poop deck!
Did you know…? The term ‘poop deck’ comes from the French word ‘poupe’, which refers to a ship’s stern.
3. Get in a fight
A recent cruise in Australia ended with 23 passengers being escorted off their cruise ship after a fight broke out between passengers.
4. Walk around the ship in your bath robe or swimwear
Technically not a crime but please put some clothes on! No one wants to be stood next to guy wearing just a banana hammock at the buffet… I leave this picture to your imagination!
5. Have sex in public areas
Moving swiftly on from banana hammocks (perhaps). No one wants to go for their after-dinner stroll and trip over a couple ‘at it’ on deck. I’m not making this up, this has happened to cruisers – I don’t know who would be more embarrassed?!
6. Walk around naked on your balcony
Especially when you’re in port! I dare you to Google ‘cruise balcony naked’ but don’t say I didn’t warn you!
7. Be rude to the staff
Just because you’re on a cruise, it doesn’t give you the right the treat waiting staff like slaves. I’m shocked at people forgetting to show courtesy to the staff. I always enjoy making friends with the bar and waiting staff who serve me, they are people just trying to get on with their job and earn a living.
8. Commit murder
In 2017, a woman was tragically killed by her husband whilst on a cruise. Fortunately this is not a common occurrence; the man was arrested and handed over to police in Alaska.
9. Be late back to the ship on a port day
Not only could you run the risk of being left behind in port, if the cruise ship is delayed waiting for you, the cruise line could be fined thousands of dollars. You also annoy all of the cruise passengers! Always check the time that you need to be back and ensure you change your watch to the correct time if there is a time difference.
10. Throw rubbish overboard
Our oceans are already filled with plastics that are polluting their delicate ecosystems. One of most best things about cruising is being able to look for miles across the beautiful ocean. Rubbish thrown overboard can also get sucked into the cruise ship’s engine and cause major problems.
Have you ever witness any of these cruise crimes? Share your stories in the comments below. Would love to hear some of them.
Happy cruising!
Laura is a UK cruise blogger based in Cornwall, UK. She founded Cruise Lifestyle in 2016 to share useful advice about cruising, destinations and food.
Last port visited: Bridgetown, Barbados
Next port of call: unknown, but she can’t wait for cruising to resume safely!
Find me on: Twitter
